A classic of note, I know 😉 but I rediscovered it a few weeks ago while sorting out my playlists.
Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey starts with “Just a small-town girl… Livin’ in a lonely world…” What more can I say? From a small town myself, the song settles itself in a homely spot. Years ago I wrote this post about my home town, which basically explains how I ended up in Gqeberha at the mere age of 21 with all of my belongings. I took the midnight “train to anywhere.” Everything after that has been a journey of smokey pubs, the smell of wine, streetlights and people.
To be honest, I am ready to get onto a train to anywhere again. I am not saying I am tired of PE, but a change would be good. New people and lamp posts that are not knocked over. (It seems like a really big thing in our part of the city!)
Workin’ hard to get my fillEverybody wants a thrillPayin’ anything to roll the diceJust one more time
I am longing for another chance to change little parts of myself. The roll of a dice to see if it works out or not. The flip of a coin to see where I’ll end up. But things are different now. We have a tiny human to think of. It is not like I can pack all of my bags and get on a jetplane off to anywhere anymore. Not because we can’t change, but we can’t gamble on a maybe. Maybe?
In a month’s time, I will visit my not-so-small-anymore hometown again. But this is a nerve-wracking trip and I am anxious just thinking about it. I am always excited to see my family, but this trip will be a bit different. For the first time since I fell pregnant, I will be without the almost-6-year old kid for longer than 6 hours. It is insane: I swear I suffer from separation anxiety! But maybe, just maybe, this is my chance to change little parts of myself after all. Perhaps I will get to write another paragraph, draw a picture if the flight’s delayed. I might finally get a moment to catch up with old friends and just spend more intense time with my family. I believe this will be a trip of self-discovery and, like this song, I might rediscover some parts of myself I misplaced. Maybe I will find myself also singing the blues. Who knows? Anything is possible, just don’t stop believin’.
So, I drew you a picture of a unicorn just to remind you to don’t stop believin’. Sometimes your longing for change is just baby (toddler) steps away.
Yours in journey and adventure,
