“I didn’t even know you were pregnant.” This is what I’ve heard from many people who bumped into me and my big-bellied figure carrying our jellybean. “Well, hmm, maybe because I didn’t tell you?” Or “Maybe because I did not have your number even though I wanted to tell you?” Or “Maybe because I haven’t seen you in so many months.” Or, maybe, just maybe, because I did not broadcast scans of our baby on social media. You know, if it is not in your social feed, it did not happen. Like posts of my meals. My friends on Facebook must think I never eat and my followers on Instagram must think I only drink and eat candy and cake… If we go with this theory.
Yes, I did not broadcast it. And not for one minute because I wasn’t excited or feeling blessed, or whatever other captions so many people in my newsfeed give their photos of something I still can’t see is a human being. My gynaecologist explained it every time. I have a very vivid imagination, but I did admire his imagination even more. I did not share it publicly because I didn’t want to. To me being pregnant was a very personal – and spiritual – thing. Why would I share something as personal as being knocked up by my husband with people I hardly ever see in real life? As mentioned, I have a very vivid imagination. Exactly.
I am not saying I didn’t tell anyone. It was not like a teenage pregnancy I’d hope nobody will take note of. Then attend another school for a term or two, while actually being on maternity leave…
When I found out I was pregnant I phoned my husband, my mother, my specialist, my GP and my mother in law. In that order. I also told my friend I was helping with a farewell party, since being on the social committee not drinking G&T will be obvious. And then, at the farewell party, one other friend who found it strange that I was on the social committee and preferred Appletizer to G&T. Nobody else. We kept it quiet until our GP confirmed it was a real pregnancy. Then we told our siblings. After the twelve-week scan, we informed our close friends. And then, when we saw people to whom it would matter, we told them too. And that was it.
Apart from an old school friend who posted the day of our child’s birth on Facebook and a client who was too excited not to post a photo while being the babysitter during a meeting, I still have not shared this blatantly on social media. This is my first official announcement. Our boy will be one in less than two months.